How to overcome limiting beliefs from a feminine Approach.

We view the world from the curtain of our minds from the beliefs and values that are ingrained in our subconscious mind and it’s for this very reason that each woman must strive to identify and overcome any limiting beliefs holding them back.

As a blog, we’re heavily dedicated to women’s holistic wellness as well as empowerment, and that is why I thought that it would be very impactful to learn not only how you can overcome limiting beliefs from a scientific perspective but also through life-changing feminine rituals such as a candle lighting and affirmations.

Stick around for more.

The meaning of limiting beliefs.

Here’s a fun fact: all the information that your mind holds true isn’t necessarily facts but what you derive from experiences.

Limiting beliefs are either conscious or non-conscious thought patterns that influence how we show up in the world.

Now let’s take a closer look at the two words “limiting,” meaning restrictive “beliefs,” something accepted as true.

When restrictive thought patterns recur constantly in our minds then they become embedded as beliefs.

Let me give you a little background story of myself weaved into…

Limiting beliefs examples.

Limiting beliefs Can be about anything and everything, stuff like I can’t parallel park to I have zero luck with men.So here are the areas to watch out for:

Financial limiting beliefs.

I come from a third-world African country, and my family was a low-income household.

Let me paint the picture of what it really looked like, we were lucky enough to make three meals even if it meant lending, the three meals were quite basic and did not adhere to nutrition, I remember that meat was a true luxury and I could truly count the number of times we ate it in a year.

I got sent home for not paying my school fees on time plenty of times and I didn’t know what bacon tasted like until I was an adult.

When I received my university calling letter, my spirit dampened a little further because, well. I couldn’t go because not only could we not afford it, but also, on this side of the continent, there’s no such thing as sponsored education; you must chip in a hefty amount either way.

Alright, now I digress.

Financial limiting beliefs are especially real for those of us who come from a somewhat underprivileged background.

I had to sift through so many experiences to rewrite this story anew but this is not where my limiting beliefs stopped.

Examples of money-limiting beliefs;

• Financial abundance is not for people like me.
• Wealthy people are mean and get their money through unscrupulous dealings.
• I don’t come from money; hence, I cannot get rich.

Relationship limiting beliefs.

In my early twenties, I approached love from this wounded feminine energy, and as a result, those first relationships weren’t exactly what I had imagined.

I began to think that I had this bad luck with the guys I attracted.

Until I was a little more mature enough to take responsibility and, most importantly, reframe this belief that I attracted “bad boys”.

The reason that I am narrating my experiences to you is because, by the very end, I want you to walk away with the knowledge that you, too can identify and overcome limiting beliefs that steal from surreal experiences on earth.

Examples of limiting beliefs about love:

• My oh my all the good guys are already taken.
• I can only attract bad boys.
• Good men are boring.
• True love is not for me.

Career limiting beliefs.

So many women are partly responsible for the gender disparities we experience in our careers.

We watch some barely qualified guy get promoted before us because we self-sabotage, we hold these impeccable, unearthly standards for ourselves, and meanwhile, said Joel has blind faith in his skills.

Examples of career limiting beliefs.

• I still need to improve in skills d and e so I can finally be deserving of a promotion.
• Only men ever hold high positions in this company.
• I am really not that good at what I do.

Limiting beliefs about health.

There’s this rather peculiar woman who’s an acquaintance of my mum, why she’s peculiar is because she’s always making up an ailment every waking hour, sometimes she’ll be suffering from multiple “ailments,” I shan’t dismiss that some of them might be real, but she functions like you and me daily and she doesn’t go to see any doctor.

Basically speaking, this woman who’s in her 50s never has anything else to speak about other than what she’s ailing from; she’s fully convinced that it’s her point of interest, and thus, she must narrate her woes to anyone who cares to listen.

You may be wondering where I am headed with this; if the placebo effect can cajole sick patients into relief, so can opposite thoughts of sickness.

Examples of limiting beliefs about health.

• This ailment runs in my family, so how can I be an exemption?
• My “x” body part is always paining.

Self-worth limiting beliefs.

At some point, we have all experienced that lingering feeling of “I am not good enough,” either because someone said it or we just felt inadequate in comparison to another.

When we repeat those thought patterns regularly they become a part of our identity.

Limiting beliefs about the world.

While some people view the world as this awesome snow globe that holds multiple possibilities, others see it as a desolate place where only uncalled-for things occur.

In the same world, different perspectives are influenced by belief systems. Such limiting beliefs might be something along the lines of  “This earth hates all humans.”

Is this belief true?
Can I absolutely tell if it’s true?
How do I react when I believe this thought?
Who would I be without this thought?

Bryon Katie’s “the work.”

Where do limiting beliefs come from.

Limiting beliefs stem from various sources as follows:

Family upbringing.

Children are fluid, moldable, and open to suggestions, but what happens when the mold “parents/guardians/siblings/extended family members hold a negative outlook on things?

Children start to adapt that outlook as their own, they get molded into an adult who holds certain assumptions.

In fact, if most of us were to investigate the root factor behind our limiting beliefs, it would be closely tied to our upbringings.

Societal conditioning.

Social constructivism is a sociology theory that explains that all the knowledge (information) we acquire is a result of interaction with others.

We’re not as independent in thinking as we like to believe.

This is why society can heavily impact our thought patterns including those of limiting beliefs.

We pick thoughts up from peers, television, social media, parents, teachers, etc.

Emotional wounds or traumatic events.

Experiencing an unnerving life event can expose you to the formation of limiting beliefs.

For example, one moment of being embarrassed or bullied can imprint “I am not good enough.” Your mind will replay a traumatic event until you start to believe in said thoughts.

Past failures or repeated experiences.

In my earlier narration, I kept attracting substandard relationships in my early 20s this repeated experience made me positively believe that I couldn’t attract any better.

Another case scenario is trying something, i.e., learning a skill multiple times or even sending your CV to multiple companies only to receive rejection; this can heavily impact the formation of limiting beliefs such as “maybe I am not skilled enough.”

Gender role expectations.

Although this falls under societal conditioning, it deserves to be highlighted separately because,, as women, we are more likely to be stifled by gender role-limiting beliefs.

Growing up, I used to believe that I would never work, I would go from my father’s household straight to my prince charming, and I would never have to earn a dime; I had relegated my finances to someone’s mercy.

This was what I had grown up believing as a result of societal conditioning. I really had to work hard to stop this limiting beliefs from taking hold of my life.

We grow up with the idea of what a woman should be, how she should behave, and what is expected of her and it’s astounding to think that we become of this awareness as little girls.

The science behind how to overcome limiting beliefs.

Nothing beats blurb more than evidence a.k.a facts.

How do we overcome limiting beliefs from a scientific p.o.v?

1.The role of Neuroplasticity in rewiring the brain.

The Hebbian theory is a neurophysiological theory that explains “neurons that fire simultaneously wire together.”

Meaning that when a thought is repeated constantly, it forms and strengthens new neuropathways which is what we call neuroplasticity.

This information revealed that our brains are not fixed, we’re capable of rewriting our beliefs to better navigate life.

To learn more about neuroplasticity, click here.

2.Cognitive bias.

The same way limiting beliefs form strong neuropathways is the same way that this neuron can be weakened by more empowering viewpoints.

About 95% of our thoughts and behaviors are influenced by the subconscious mind. Repetition of limiting beliefs strengthens those neuro-pathways.

Once a belief settles in the subconscious mind, the reality is filtered to confirm your belief as reality, something called confirmation bias.

The 6 steps to overcome limiting beliefs.

It takes lots of intentionality to overcome limiting beliefs that you have been operating from for years; this is why you will need a framework somewhere you can begin.

Before we discuss the methods you can use to overcome limiting beliefs we shall first go through all the steps you will journey through to go from limiting to empowering beliefs.

1. Awareness.

Your being here is evidence that you”have come into the awareness of limiting beliefs or several that may be holding you back.

This is the first step in overcoming that limiting belief.

Limiting beliefs may show up as repetitive thoughts that cause, fear, self-doubt, procrastination, and competitiveness.

2. Identifying the root cause.

Great, you’ve now identified one limiting belief, it’s I don’t feel good enough. Now it’s time to dig up the life experiences that shaped this thought into your belief.

Let’s start with childhood. Did anything happen in childhood? How about your adolescent years? How about your adult years? Was it a recent occurrence?

Bingo “Maybe it was how your mother treated you; it was in her snide remarks and her obvious lack of satisfaction in anything you did or your existence.”

Maybe it is less obvious than that and it was actually an awful girl named Jessica from grade 7 who made you feel like you were the most unattractive and boring girl.

Alright, now we have our limiting beliefs and the root cause moving forward.

3. Questioning the legitimacy of your limiting beliefs.

I know I keep saying “your” limiting beliefs, but believe me, those beliefs have only served to try and protect you as your mind believes so.

This is where questioning how true those beliefs are, are they really yours? Or did someone else impose them, did a traumatic life experience impose them on you?

4. Rewriting the story through an empowering belief.

The power of choice swoops in to save the moment; it’s not magical and instant, but by choosing an empowering belief to counter each limiting belief, we’re on to something.

Instead of “I am not enough,” how about “Hey, I am actually not so bad; if you think about it, I am actually good, good enough.”

5. Embodying new empowering beliefs.

You start behaving and feeling as though the new belief is true. You let it sink into your body, actions, and identity.

6. Reinforce your new beliefs.

Reinforce your new belief through action, repetition, and emotional connection.When you show up every day as this woman who has empowering beliefs over time, it becomes your new reality.

With all the 6 steps(framework )to overcoming limiting beliefs in place, let’s look at the actual techniques that will help you overwrite this belief.

14 Scientific+ feminine Approaches to overcome limiting beliefs.

Just because you’re in the process of overcoming limiting beliefs doesn’t simply mean that you should stray far from the essence of your feminine energy, this is why you will find both scientific and feminine Approaches below:

These approaches/methods are scattered across the six-step framework we just discussed above.

Without further ado:

1. Journaling prompts.

Whenever you feel lost go and journal. This is especially helpful in the awareness stage where you’re starting to unearth limiting beliefs.

Here are a few journal prompts to help you identify any self-limiting :

• “What belief is keeping me from moving forward?”
• “Where might this belief have come from?”
• “What would I do if I didn’t believe this anymore?”

2. Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) techniques.

Cognitive behavioral therapy is a short-term therapy that focuses on the interplay between thought patterns, emotions, and behavior.

With the help of a CBT therapist, you will be guided on using CBT techniques such as cognitive reframing, journaling, and exposure therapy to identify negative thoughts and reframe them into empowering thoughts.

To learn more about CBT click here.

3.Visualization.

Visualization is a very powerful tool when rewiring your subconscious mind especially when it goes hand in hand with engaged emotions.

Now sit or lie in a comfortable position, relax your body, close your eyes, and imagine yourself living in your new belief; how does it feel? How does it feel to know that you’re gorgeous and worth it?

4. Bryon Katie’s “The Work.“

Bryon Katie is an American author/speaker who teaches a genius and simple self-inquiry technique to combat stressful thoughts.

The work is a worksheet made up of four questions that you can ask yourself whenever you face limiting beliefs.

Thery are as follows:

• Is this belief true?
• Can I absolutely know it’s true?
• How do I react when I believe this thought?
• Who would I be without this thought?

5. Scripting.

Write in the present tense as if the new belief is already true.

Tell the story of your life from this new perspective.

I.e. I am really good at what I do; I enjoy my job a lot.

6. Using an anchor object.

The objects that we possess are more than material things; they are tied to our identity (emotions, beliefs, and values).

Assigning a new belief to an object such as a necklace, bracelet, perfume, or crystal is a good way to keep you in character whenever you find yourself, resulting in old limiting beliefs.

So now that you have your new empowering belief in place I want you to find an anchor object that you take with you almost everywhere.

7. Affirmations.

The constant repetition of affirmative statements has been scientifically proven to be very effective in rewriting old beliefs by strengthening new neuropathways.

For every limiting belief that you hold create a simple affirmative statement that you can repeat in the morning or before sleeping.

8. EFT tapping for overcoming limiting beliefs.

The emotional freedom technique(EFT) tapping is a psychological technique used to relieve anxiety and stress that involves tapping different meridian points, such as below the collarbone and between your eyebrows while repeating affirmative statements.

Many have attested to how much EFT has helped them to combat negative thought patterns.

9. visualization.

In a relaxed state, close your eyes and imagine yourself living your new beliefs. Engage your five senses and emotions to better embed your belief.

10. Feminine rituals.

The beauty of femininity is that we can create significant and empowering rituals around anything including eliminating limiting beliefs here are a few examples:

• Light a candle a few minutes each day and repeat affirmations to embody your new belief, i.e., “I am beautiful, worth it, and very lovable; I am a gift to this world.”
• Mirror work, look at your eyes in the mirror and repeat affirmative statements that align with your empowering beliefs. I.e. ” I attract a good partner who loves and respects me.” say it with emotion and conviction.
• Love notes on strategic places in your space to affirm your new beliefs.
• Little gifts to yourself that support your new belief, i.e., a bouquet of flowers if you’re working on your self-worth, a trophy if you struggle with imposter syndrome in your career. e.t.c

11.subliminal audios.

Subliminal audios are high-frequency calming audios that contain hidden affirmative messages that bypass the conscious mind but are picked up by the subconscious mind, which carries our beliefs.

This means that this empowering thought doesn’t meet any resistance by our logical mind but instead helps to reprogram our beliefs.

Nowadays, you will find plenty of subliminals about everything: money/career/love, etc., on YouTube and Spotify.

12.Mindfulness/meditation.

In today’s overstimulated society all we do is consume information but do we really know what is going on inside our heads? Can we hear without muting the noise.

This is why intentionally comes in through quiet moments of mindfulness or meditation.

Awareness of your beliefs looks like observing your thought patterns without judging yourself.

13.Do inner child work.

Why do you need to connect with that little girl you once were? Because the fact is many of your beliefs stem from her, she was the foundation.

You need to connect with her and offer her understanding and new beliefs she can hold on to; here are a few journaling prompts to get you started.

• What beliefs do I think developed in my childhood that have held me back?
• Where did those beliefs come from?
• If I could give younger me new empowering beliefs what would they be?

14. Lastly the Evidence reversal list.

To close this off, I want you to start a list on paper or notepad that contains evidence that contradicts your limiting belief each time it happens.

If your limiting belief is around your ability to make past a certain amount of money, create a list with all the events where you contradicted that belief.

This will only serve to reinforce your new belief.

Parting short.

Ladies, this has been a refreshing topic; I certainly do hope that you’ve walked away enlightened on how you can and will, in fact, overcome limiting beliefs.

From our six-step framework that involves steps such as awareness and embodying empowering beliefs to the 14 methods of overwriting limiting beliefs such as inner child work, cognitive behavioral techniques, and feminine rituals.

I am rooting for you, babe; you’ve got this.

Let me know in the comments whether you’ve ever felt stifled by any limiting belief and whether You’ve already overcome it or you’re ready to do so?